I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
he thought i was a dude.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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