Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
