Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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