I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
