Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
