i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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