He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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