I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
