does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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