Kiss
Puke
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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