I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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