how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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