she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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