I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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