Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
