Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
