i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
