When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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