dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize