C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
