I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
is wine microwaveable?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
