I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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