Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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