So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize