This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Randomize