have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
