Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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