Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
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