Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
did i just pee glitter
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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