He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
i drank out of a bidet.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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