he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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