her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
