I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
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