OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
