Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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