I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
