Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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