I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
