my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
