Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
