when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
