all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He better not be in your backpack
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
