Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
