Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
