Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize