i think my tv is drunk
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
