I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
