Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
