oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
We need to rekindle our bromance
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
