Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
